A week ago I was messing around on Linkedin and came across a part time job teaching people how to use the internet and general computer stuff.
I applied.
I figured it would be a little bit of extra cash and also give me a bit more volunteer work to do in order to help out and be involved with a different part of the community.
During the interview I was asked if I would consider full time. IE. 37 hours per week. Well I looked at the ceiling and thought about it and then said, "Yes. Why not?"
But now I am worried that I have just ruined my life. I feel that if I take the full time post, I will have lost all control of my life and be returning to the old styley Christine, working all hours that god sends in order to get the job done due to the fact that I won't leave something half done, coming up with new ideas to make things more interesting for the customers and increase profits for the business, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera.
I don't want that any more. I escaped that. I am happy foraging, recycling, crafting, baking, going for long walks with the dogs, trying to get a community website built up to improve the area and all the rest of the stuff that makes my life fun, relaxing and pleasant. The long hours and hard work that it takes to maintain this pleasant life are rewarding rather than binding.
I will be back in the situation where money controls my life rather than money being a bonus.
I won't be able to do the volunteer work that I have recently started with the community group because I won't have time.
Someone else will be walking my dogs.
I won't see any of the wonders of the day because I will be stuck inside.
This, my dear friends, is fate kicking me in teeth for not acting upon the crazy thought that I had midweek, when I saw a little cottage in a few acres of land for rent on the isle of Uist.
Addendum
Positive proof that I am worried and stressed out. I can make an upside down cake with my eyes shut. I can make an upside down cake whilst writing a thesis on rocket science. Just look at the state of this flaming thing!!!
It's half an inch thick and I have a bowl of what can only be described as caramelised shortbread. AAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHH
No, no, no, don't get stressed, it's not worth it. Calm down and eat the upside down cake - it looks definitely edible to me. It may be topsy turvy for a while but all will tun out well in the end.
ReplyDeleteLove from Mum
xx
You do not have to take on this job. Tell them you have reconsidered, apologise for causing them inconvenience and tell them you made a decision on the spot without thinking it over and could you please have the part time hours or just decide that you don't want the work at all. You might feel bad but you will have the life you love and not be stressed.
ReplyDeleteSome time ago I volunteered to work one morning a week in the emergency department of a local hospital. I worked really hard to get an interview. After the interview we were shown what we would be required to do which was far more responsibility than I ever imagined. I went home with a sick feeling in my stomach and knew that I couldn't possibly take on the position. I left it a couple of days and then plucked up the courage to phone and say I wouldn't be able to volunteer after all and apologised. I do believe they thought I was rather strange and annoying, but really, my sanity is rather more important than what anyone thinks. I bumped into one of the ladies who sat in on the interview, an aquaintance from when the kids were in primary school. She looked at me as if I was a worm. It was awkward for me, but once again I reassured myself that she did not live my life, she didn't know my circumstances and really it was none of her business.
I do hope you can make the best decision for you.
Anne xx
@Mum - I am never so far unhinged that I would waste food :). I poured some custard onto a slice of the thing and it turns out to be one of the best apple crumble toppings that I have ever made hee hee
ReplyDelete@Anne - Thank you for your comments, I know they make perfect sense but I still feel obliged to honour my side of the bargain, at least until they find someone else to do the job. It won't kill me.
There is still hope though because it's not definite that the job is mine yet.
I agree, you don't have to take the job. Just say no.
ReplyDeleteGet your life back.
Sft x